The Prompt:

Facing (and Fearing) by Dan Andrews

Greatness appeals to the future. If I can be firm enough to-day to do right, and scorn eyes, I must have done so much right before as to defend me now. Be it how it will, do right now. Always scorn appearances, and you always may. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Trusting intuition and making decisions based on it is the most important activity of the creative artist and entrepreneur. If you are facing (and fearing) a difficult life decision, ask yourself these three questions:

1) “What are the costs of inaction?” I find it can be helpful to fight fear with fear. Fears of acting are easily and immediately articulated by our “lizard brains” (thanks Seth) e.g. what if I fail? what if I look stupid? If you systematically and clearly list the main costs of inaction, they will generally overshadow your immediate fears.

2) “What kind of person do I want to be?” I’ve found this question to be extremely useful. I admire people who act bravely and decisively. I know the only way to join their ranks is to face decisions that scare me. By seeing my actions as a path to becoming something I admire, I am more likely to act and make the tough calls.

3) “In the event of failure, could I generate an alterative positive outcome?” Imagine yourself failing to an extreme. What could you learn or do in that situation to make it a positive experience? We are generally so committed to the results we seek at the outset of a task or project that we forget about all the incredible value and experience that comes from engaging the world proactively, learning, and improving our circumstances as we go along.

 

In light of me pursuing my dream to be a successful author, I have plenty of fears from  time to time.

1. What are the costs of inaction?

Inaction for me means I stop writing because I am afraid of the outcome, afraid of what people would think of my writing. Here’s my self conversation:

• What if I already tried my best but it wasn’t enough? It doesn’t really matter, does it? I believe our task was just to do the best of our ability. In God’s eyes (or in any good people’s eyes) we are not judged based on the result, but on the effort. I also know that I’m most disappointed when I felt like I haven’t done my best. If I didn’t get it but I tried my best, that’s alright. I could try again or walk away knowing that I’ve done my best.
• What if I failed? Yeah, even a child failed doing its first step. Should I tell them not to try again?
• But I’m not a child anymore! Even better, right? I already know that persistence does result in something great! (I can walk!)
• What if people think I’m stupid? Stupid for following your dreams? No way. I know I’m smart!
• But what if people think I’m wasting my talent? I should’ve code/be a project manager/etc. Umm… do I want people say I’m awesome but I’m killing yourself by doing something I dislike? Besides, I couldn’t be awesome when I’m unhappy. At least not as awesome as when I’m happy.

I’m grateful I have family and friends who supported me, who believe wholeheartedly that I could make this happen. I believe I could too.

2. What kind of person do I want to be?

I want to be someone who could inspire others to follow their dreams. Make it or die trying! That means I should never give up, shouldn’t I? By the way, this was why I also love to read biographies. It made me realize that behind every great person’s success, they must’ve had some difficulties. The more successful they are, usually the harder their difficulties. Being successful is sometimes just a matter of toughing it out and keep at it.

3. In the event of failure, could I generate an alternative positive outcome?

Yes, of course! If I had written 10+ books and they were all rejected, I could try self publishing. If that failed as well, at least I’ve written 10+ novels. True, it might be a little bit depressing when I turned 50 and haven’t produced anything great. Then again, they were never any guarantee that I would produce greatness had I chose the other way. At least I know I had given it my very best ;).